It has been said that men are like microwaves and women are like ovens. Men are ready to go at any second while women need some time to warm up. This means that when the moment comes it is easy for us guys to be ready to go but not so easy for our wives. That is why we as guys need to step up the romance, get our game on and make an effort to keep the romance alive for our wives.
Women love being romanced. They want to be wanted, to know that you are thinking about them and love them all the time. Not just when the moment arrives. Little things go a long way.
When was the last time you bought your wife flowers? Not just for a special occasion but on any random day just to say "I love you and I wanted to do something special for you". A note left on the bathroom mirror before you go to work is a great way to make her smile and she will be thinking about you all day and waiting for you to get home. When you get home from work, tell her you missed her and give a kiss. Not just a peck on the lips but a real kiss. My wife says if she can't remember the kiss then it didn't count so give her a kiss she'll remember.
Helping around the house and with the kids is a great way to show her you love her. Do the dishes, change a diaper or two, watch the kids so she can take an uninterrupted shower. If you don't know where to start just ask her if she needs help with anything. Try and think about her needs as well as your own. She has had a long day too and everyone likes a break.
Try and go on dates every so often. It can be hard with small children but it is worth the effort. The last date we went on we had Grandma watch our two-year-old and just brought baby Emerald along with us. Go for walks, it is easy to bring the kids in strollers or whatever. Hold her hand while you are walking. Remember how you used to hold hands everywhere you went?
All these things are just ways to let our wives know we love them and appreciate them. If you let them know how you feel all the time it will be much easier to have some quality time together when those moments come along. Also, as life will do when there are little kids around, things aren't always going to go as expected. Don't get mad if you have to hold off and postpone for another time. Just take it as it comes and make the most of it. Nothing will kill the mood for your wife faster then if you get upset with her because she has to go and take care of one of the kids.
So. The point of all this is not just some cheat sheet to help you get your wife between the sheets. It is about changing how we think about our marriages and remembering that our wives love to be romanced and if they feel special so will you. ;)